For the past three years , no one had spoken to me , spoken about the ancient spiritual truths with me since leaving the island , this island of great calling . I had to learn by myself to grow alone in fortitude and to cling to the meaning of a divine name once given to me in ceremony by my teacher , a name that symbolized “courage “. There was a mystery about that man , a mystery I wanted to unlock like a rusty gate with honeysuckle and fern caught in its small key-hole . The past I had spent here was different now . I was changed too and the island felt smaller like a blurry ghost in the distance , panting with a sorrow of long ago , a sweetness and a sorrow that wrung my heart . . .

Sitting alone outside the yoga courtyard , a cool overcast morning , I saw her pass by on a bicycle ( I had never seen her before ) . She gave a hand signal to turn , a clue that she was from Europe . I felt a small , sharp , piercing inside my body and just sat very still for awhile . And then I knew everything was alright and life was exactly how it was meant to be and with this acknowledgement , a gust of music blew thru my braided hair loosing and setting it free and it comforted me . I had a letter to mail and walked to the post office and suddenly again , a feeling of fire burning me deep inside … she was exiting as I was entering … I looked , for a quick moment , into her small close-set eyes and saw a recognition between us and too , I saw her eyes merge into one large beautiful eye of translucent light , the light of a goddess . She was perfect for him . I felt her strength and was surprised at how tall she was , larger than me , and beautiful like a cloudless blue sky morning .

I walked and walked , an enormous silence enveloped in my soul . I wanted to be near the beach , near the cool water to calm the fire in my heart . I walked slow , panting from the mysterious moment so unexpected of seeing my lost loves , new love . And then as suddenly as it had occurred , my past detached and the freedom of its acceptance was like a waterfall , an untamed waterfall so clear and fresh like cool air molecules of the wooded pine where I had once rode horses with my beloved . And a new gust of music overwhelmed me in its joyful sound , rushing like the note of a gentle flute above the pounding of a beating drum  . Feeling in the presence of a rich and gripping masterpiece that I was surrendering too , a white car passed me from behind , down North Beach road … it was him ! … he glanced at me  … I saw his face … but he didn’t know it was me ( or didn’t want to stop ) . I stood silent on this immense island between  sand and sea . A single tear fallen , a voyage flowering , cascading like the river flow of my heart , while no one speaks to me . . .

 

Eastsound Bay by meg dickerson

 

remember the fish on the shore

love was a glowing blue eye

remember we stared and stared more

and then found a place on the bay to lie

two lovely eyes

a winter to die

two lovely eyes .

 

remember my statute that would cry

its broken arms you tried to heal

you came over me like a holy light

following the fish on the shore for more that night

two lovely eyes

a winter to die

two lovely eyes .

” Freedom and love go together . Love is not a reaction . If I love you because you love me that is a mere trade , a thing to be bought in the market , it is not love . To love is not to ask anything in return , not even to feel that you are giving something … and it is only such love that you can know freedom “. … Jiddu Knishnamurti